Tonight I’ll be the guest on the talk show Closet Talk, hosted by Jay of jaysays.com. How I came out (of the closet) to my wife, popular crossdressing myths, and the psychology involved in being a crossdresser will be among the discussion topics covered. The show’s air time and link are listed further down.
The show
Closet Talk is a show that interviews LGBT people and their families to discuss life before and after the closet, the effects of coming out (for better or worse) and what those considering “coming out” can expect. Everyone’s story is different. Interviewees provide insight into their lives and the struggles with sexuality, religion and family. It airs every Wednesday.
About the host
Founder, activist and dreamer, Jay Morris, began jaysays.com as a small personal project to stay in touch with family and friends. Over time, his site developed into what you see today with a focus on LGBT issues and current events. Jay has been in a committed, loving relationship with Team Member, Christopher, for nearly 12 years and looks forward to many more years together.
The t-girl without a voice
When Jay asked me to be a guest on the show, the first thing that came to mind was the fact that it’s a talk show, meaning I would need to talk to be on it. Many crossdressers simply talk in their regular guy-voice when they’re en femme. Some of us dress up our voice along with the rest of our body. Unfortunately, at this point in time, my femme-voice is less than convincing (to put it lightly). I prefer not to mix and match my femme-side with my man-side, and that includes the sound of my voice. The psychological process that comes into play with this aspect of my life is actually pretty interesting, even to me. I’ll be discussing this to some extent on the show tonight and may elaborate on it in a future article.
I’m a work-in-progress and my feminine voice will get better, but it’s a lengthy training process that takes some time to master. I only hope that the (current) sound of my femme-voice is not distracting from the more serious subject matter of the show.
Showtime
The show is 30 minutes and airs live at 9:00 PM tonight (Eastern Time). Here’s a link to the show page: Gabrielle Hermosa on Closet Talk. You can leave comments and ask questions while the show is in progress via the chat room on the show page. You’ll need to first create an account at Blog Talk Radio (it’s free) in order to sign into the chat session. If you cannot listen live tonight or missed the show, it will be available for replay via the streaming link.
I hope you’ll join us tonight, or check it out later if you’re reading this after it aired. Please chime in and let me know what you thought about the the discussion.
Update, July 24:
Just a quick follow-up to the show: I’ve listened to to the show twice and as expected, my femme-voice was terrible, but it shouldn’t be too distracting for listeners after a few minutes of getting used to.
During the show, I brought up the term “femulation”, which is essentially the art of emulating a female. This term (as far as I know) was coined by Staci Lana of femulate.org. Check out Staci’s blog some time if you have not already. It’s loaded with great stories, humor, and beauty tips.
Unfortunately, I rambled on with unnecessary details several times and failed to hit several important points: mainly explaining more about the great diversity within the crossdressing and transgendered community. I apologize to my fellow sisters about that. It was the first time I ever tried to talk live about such things and a good learning experience. I shall do a better job of focusing in the future.
I would like to extend my thanks to Jay for asking me to be on the show and allowing me the opportunity to talk about some of the aspects in the life of a crossdresser. Although my femme-voice was weak and I rambled on a bit much, I rather enjoyed the experience and appreciated the opportunity to be on the show. Thanks Jay! :)
Wow, terrific news! Have a blast. I am afraid I won’t be at my computer live with my Pom Poms going for you, but will look for the link tomorrow.
Good luck Madam Ambassador!
Thanks for the support, Petra! :) I’m a bit nervous, but looking forward to discussing the topics. And thank you so much for the “ambassador” title!! I will do my very best to represent as much of the cd/tg community as I can, but it is important to understand that we’re all very different (something I know you’re well aware, but wanted to mention for other visitors reading this).
In the show, I will discuss how things work for me in addition to what I understand of how it works in others. I feel it is very important to paint a picture of diversity in the transgendered community because although we all have common interest in feminine self expression, we are also as different and diverse as any other slice of the human population.
Ambassador eh? Do you get to hand out cigars and wear a posh long black dress? You lucky thing you :)
Weak jokes aside, good luck for the big event. I hope it goes well.
Yes, and Yes. That was part of the deal we worked out as payment. lol
Thanks for the well wishes, Lynn! :)
I hope you don’t mind bubble gum cigars as that’s all I’ve got ;).
Looking forward to the show.
Bubble gum cigars will do just fine, Jay! lol
Looking forward to the show, and chat with you soon. :)
Gabrielle – thanks for opening up for the show. I think it went terrifically. Anyone reading this note who has not listened, should.
So much of your story echoes mine. Hearing you give your voice to the story was special for me.
Crossdressers are, I think we all agree, not well understood or represented in the mainstream world.
Things are not always completely rosy in communities that on the surface you would hope would be fully welcoming. I think we all sometimes feel like the T is the red-headed stepchild of the LGBT family.
Within the LGBT world there seems to me to be a certain amount of uncertainty about exactly where the hetero cross dresser fits too.
I really think you did a great job of helping Jay’s audience better understand where we fit. That’s huge.
Thanks – Petra
and btw … when you are relaxed (not easy in front of a microphone) your voice is lovely, natural and from within. Much envy…
Thanks for the feedback on the show, Petra. :) You and I do have a lot of similarities between us, and that probably extends well beyond us to many other crossdressers. It is a shame that we’re not really represented in the mainstream world. Making crossdressing a sight gag and joke in comedies doesn’t count, either. ;)
It is clear to me where crossdressers fit in the world though. We fit everywhere non-crossdressers do. We’re humans. We’re people. We have families, loved ones, jobs, pay bills, we laugh, we cry… it’s just that when we cry, we mess up our mascara. lol Seriously – we fit in the world just fine already. There are sadly many elements of society that is uncomfortable with us and so for now, mostly remain underground. Not that any of this is news to you, but I felt like mentioning.
It was very cool of Jay to extend his welcome. I got to know him a little through our e-mail communications and reading on his website. He’s an intelligent man with some powerful writing under his belt. Hopefully, I did indeed connect some of the dots for his regular audience. I understand that to most people we are quite the mystery. I was a pretty good mystery to myself until just a few years ago – not an easy way to move through life.
Thanks for your kind words on my voice. :) It sounds terribly silly to me when I listen to it… but listening to the show as I did, it becomes more tolerable after a while. I can’t say I have a lovely voice (ty, btw!) but I’m working on it. :)
Gabrielle – again, thank you. I can’t express my appreciation enough. Part of my goal is to always be fully inclusive, and in all honesty, in spite of my belief that I’m open minded and understanding, I never even considered the fact that cross-dressers were part of the “T” community – it just never occurred to me. I chalk that up to ignorance and I have a feeling many people in my audience will have a similar epiphany because of you.
Thank you for helping me open my mind even further – humanity is infinite.
Now the problem is, what to do next? ;)
You’re welcome, Jay. I appreciate your inviting me on the show. :)
In terms of crossdressers being part of the “T” community, it took me quite some time to figure out myself, or at least where I fit in. Things are much clearer in my life now and I hope I was able to shed some light on mystery of crossdressers to your listeners.
We’ve all got room to learn and grow in life. I am thankful that for people seek out opportunities to do just that, and look to expand my own understanding of humanity as well.
I don’t know what you’re going to do next, but I’m about to go pay my dues on the treadmill. lol Not what you were referring to, I know, but I’m in a bit of a silly mood right now. :)
Keep up the fine work on your show and website, Jay.
Gabrielle … I just listened to your interview on the blogtalk thingy, and really liked it! I particularly liked that Jay himself admited not knowing much about our scene, and it’s quite likely that he’ll prolly include more transgendered folks in his future programming. We constantly harp on the need to educate the straight masses, but our so-called allies, the rest of the alphabet soup, don’t know very much about us either. Good job, sexy!
As for your voice, you’re right, it didn’t take much getting used to and … hey! … it’s no weirder than Julia Child’s was!:D The message won out over the presentation, hun. That’s the important thing.
respect & love,
deja
Thanks, Deja! :) I’m glad you enjoyed the interview, in spite of my weak femme-voice. Excellent point about Julia Child! lol I don’t feel so bad now. lol I also felt that after a slight adjustment period, what I had to say was more prevalent than the sound of the voice saying it.
It was very cool of Jay to reach out like that – to another group of folks he knows is generally misunderstood and not accepted by society, and one that he knew very little about at the time. I wish all people were as eager to expand their own understanding of humanity and the great diversity that exists within.