It’s been one year since the opening first post was made here on myCDlife.com. This “one year” post happens to be the 111th published to date, which fits in nicely with the “one” theme.
If curiosity piques interest enough to look back at some of the early posts, you will notice that many of them were not crossdressing related. One of my initial ideas was to simply share with visitors, the life of a crossdresser (me), specifically to illustrate the fact that, for the most part, trans-life isn’t very different than the “norm”.
Being a crossdresser doesn’t mean that life is all about lipstick, fashion, heels, stockings and wearing dresses. I think there is a perception to many (non-trans folk) that this all crossdressers ever think and talk about. Although that may be the case for some, it is certainly not how it works in my life or the lives of several others I’ve gotten to know, including many who regularly blog about crossdressing. The trans-related posts drew more interest than the non, so I settled into a routine of concentrating more on that end of things over time.
Many of my original plans for this site were never realized, mainly due to lack of time and resources. Even so, I’m happy to have accomplishd at least some of my goals: educate visitors about the realities of crossdressing, make a positive difference in the lives of people who struggle with this aspect of their lives, share some of my own related struggles/stories, and have some fun along the way.
Having this online presence has allowed me the opportunity to interact and share ideas with some unique and interesting transgender people, from crossdressers to transsexuals. The diversity within the vast transgender spectrum is extensive and I’ve enjoyed learning about the wide array of differences while celebrating what we have in common. Although not as great in numbers, I’ve also had the pleasure of interacting with non-trans folk, too – mainly family and loved ones there of.
I don’t know what year two will hold for myCDlife.com. Even though I have trouble keeping up with things due to lack of personal time, I’d like to see it continue, if only on a limited basis (in terms of new content updates). There are more crossdressing myths to bust and countless other aspects & ideas to explore.
I’d like to thank everyone for visiting this site over the past year and hope you’ll continue to do so in the future. It’s been my pleasure and an honor to be your humble myCDlife.com hostess. Thank you so much for your time, attention, feedback, and sharing a little about yourself in return.
If you wouldn’t mind sharing, what have you enjoyed most about my offerings here? How did you discover myCDlife.com? Is there anything in particular you’d like to see more of? What would you change, if anything? Please take a moment or two to share.
Happy Anniversary Gabrielle. I have fully the year, and thank you for your work here.
The advice posts you have done up have been my favorites. Your counsel to troubled people has no doubt been of enormous benefit. Well done. This shows your very best, caring qualities. Keep it up.
If there is anything else I would like to see here, it would be happy stories about how it all is going for you. I hope you are able to expand your range, get many new Gabrielle experiences, and find them all to be positive.
Best wishes.
Petra
@ Petra – Thanks, Petra! :) I’d love to share more of my personal “happy stories”… and hope to soon. One of the reasons I don’t have much time to keep up with things here is because life has been on the difficult side as of late (in general) and that has put quite a damper on expanding horizons… or even enjoying life, period. On the brighter side, the fabulous Mrs. H. and I are planning a little something for the two of us, very much related to expanding my horizons and personal (trans) growth. It’s a small step, but so long as it is in a pair of my beloved boots, I’m excited about it. :) Life can smack me around and beat me down, but it can’t break my will, or keep this t-bitch from squeezing a little something in. ;) Wish me luck on a smooth journey and (hopefully) something “happy” to write about soon. :)
@ Lynn – Thank you, Lynn! :) I know exactly what you mean when it comes to blogs loosing their steam and fading out after a hand full of months. I seriously considered putting this one to rest a few times. I’m glad I did not.
Offering advice and counsel
One of the major driving forces behind starting this up was knowledge of the senseless, continued pain and suffering of people much like ourselves. It literally used to keep me awake at night. It took me a lifetime to understand my own existence like this, and in the end, the whole mind-f*ck of it all was in how society treated me and this topic all my life. My ultimate goal is to change how mainstream society views the transgender spectrum. Remove the lies, misconceptions, and terrible social stigma, and the embarrassment, guilt, pain and suffering of our trans-sisters will end. Of course, I have not yet worked out how to change mainstream society (and likely will not in my useful lifetime), but I can make a difference in the lives of those who find their way to my website and more so to those who reach out to me.
There’s absolutely nothing easy about what I do when it comes to offering advice and insight. It’s a process that takes up a lot of time and can leave me emotionally drained, but it is so very important. As you (and hopefully others) have noticed, I do not play favorites and I’ll tell it like it is, as best I can understand things. This is about helping people understand realities, NOT about taking sides because we have “this” in common. Tough as it is, it is also rewarding, if only on a spiritual level. I spent many years suffering. I can gripe about it, or make use of the knowledge I acquired along the way. The latter is a bit more productive.
Happy Anniversary and well done for making it to a year. A lot of blogs fold after a few months, but you’ve kept at it…. and I know how busy you are off camera ;)
Best bits? I think the advice stuff as Petra has said. It’s not ‘back patting’ advice, oftentimes there are hard and necessary truths in there.
What would I change? Good question… umm.. y’know I don’t think there’s much that I would change to be honest. To alter the form of what’s here now, would change the site.
Take care,
Lynn
x
Happy anniversary.
You asked what I, as a reader, have enjoyed over the past year.
I’ll admit that I only ‘discovered’ your wonderful site about six months ago, but took some time to go back and review many of your earlier blog entries. And I can say that I was very pleased when I did.
Being an infrequent, but longtime crossdresser, I often felt confused about why I dressed, and wondered like many, what was ‘wrong’ with me. My dressing was only occasionally ‘fetish’, always in private, and mostly I felt it was an extension and an expression of a different part of me.
When my wife discovered Kimberley, I had no idea how to explain myself. She just didn’t want to deal with it, instead imagining a gay queen running around in short skirts and big wigs. But using many of your posts, particularly the mythbusters, I was able to get her to at least listen to me and my perspective, that I’m not gay, and was very private. Not that she accepts it, but she currently keeps the ‘secret’.
I was also impressed with your courage, not only to open yourself up to the world, but to take the steps you did to ‘out’ yourself.
So, again, on behalf of this reader, congratulations on the past year.
Thank you for those kind words and for sharing some of your own story, Kimberly. :) It makes me very happy to know that my efforts here have had a positive impact in your life. I’m glad your wife is at least accepting of your feminine side. Perhaps in time, it can grow beyond just acceptance.
Even though I can’t post as frequently as I’d like, there is so much more to share and discuss. I hope you’ll continue to visit and maybe chime in from time to time. :)
Happy 1st, Gabrielle!
I think I first came to your site when one of my topic bots picked up the story of Tessa.
I liked what I saw when I read that article and some of your other writings – you have been insightful, compassionate and gentle with your suggestions to others. I admire the way that you are reaching out to others in a constructive manner.
Since then, I drop by occasionally and try to contribute a little from a slightly different, but similar, path in life.
@ Michelle – Thanks, Michelle! :) I’m glad you found your way to my site. I’ve enjoyed your input on articles very much and hope you’ll continue to drop by and share your thoughts. When it comes down to it, we’re all pretty different from one another. In that, I mean people, in general, not just those of us within the wide transgender spectrum. Even within the transgender spectrum, it is rather fascinating – how similar we are, and yet very different at the same time. Our unique qualities are rather fascinating to learn about and discuss.
@ Erin K – Thank you, Erin! :) I’m happy to be here, and very happy to have you here as well. Thanks for taking some time to drop in, read, and share in with a thought or two from time to time. I hope you’ll continue to do so.
Happy Anniversary and THANK YOU for being here!
Gabrielle, I didn’t know how young the site is. Congratulations on being around for one year, and may you continue for several more.
At the same time, may things in culture change in a manner where such pages of support are no longer needed. That it is finally realized we are doing nothing wrong, sexism is bad, double standards are BS. And so.
In the mean time, thank you for making such a respectful and encouraging site.
Thanks, Pythos. :) Yep, it’s still relatively new. Somehow, I feel like I’ve been at this for much longer than a year, perhaps because of how much hard work, blood, sweat, and tears I’ve poured into my efforts.
I long for the day when exploring social matters like this is no longer necessary. Maybe in some small way, our collective efforts will help speed things along. In the meantime, I will try to keep things running here, if only in a limited fashion.
I appreciate your input and participation here and hope you’ll continue to drop by and chime in. :)
Hi there Gabrielle!
I am back and was so glad to read a bit more of your site tonight. I am sorry to hear things have been busy/down for you and hope that whatever you have planned with your sweetheart brings some wonderful positive changes in your life. I am so glad that the two of you have each other and that she is such an ally in your journey. I imagine for so many others (and I think often on those who have written in to you for advice) it must not be like that.
Congrats on your one year!!
Take care,
Mandy
Thanks for the well wishes, Mandy, and good to hear from you again. :) Yes, unfortunately my free time has been very scarce as of late. I might try to elaborate on that in an article… when time allows. Got a new adventure to publish later today (Friday). My love to you and your family! :)
Many thanks Gabrielle. I happened upon your website this afternoon and have spent the past nearly two hours perusing. I especially enjoyed the description of your first Mall outing. You captured so many of my feelings, I could really identify with your experience. I hope you will continue to share your public experiences. Further, I remarked to myself as I read your responses to questions, that you were so caring. As a licensed Psychologist (Ph.D.) I do counseling daily and I want to compliment you for the obvious empathy and concern you showed. Best wishes to you in our shared journey. Appreciatively, Laura.
Thanks for the kind words, Laura, and you’re welcome. :) I especially enjoy hearing from trans folk who are also well educated and practiced in the psychology field. I am curious as to whether or not your professional training helped you better understand yourself or if you had a good grip on things prior to your education.
Hi again Gabrielle,
Thank you for your kind response. Some day’s; days when I would particularly appreciate encouragement, I am unsure if I yet have “a good grip on things.” I guess to the extent that I can use, during a given outing (like to lunch and to the Mall yesterday), what is referred to as “rational self counseling,” then I benefit from my years of education and practice. But many times, (like this morning where I found myself “all dressed up and no where to go”) my training apparently stands me in no better stead, than the next part time girl. That is why I valued your writings on the subject of public successes. Please do more as your time permits.
Regards,
Laura.
Thanks for sharing, Laura. :) It is a fascinating place to be in – I mean the understanding of how being oneself works vs. the reception from others when venturing out into the “wild”. I got a grip on things late in my life, not having any formal education in psychology and (until a few years ago) too afraid to do any real research on the subject (of being trans). Today, there is never any time when I doubt who or what I am – I truly love being trans. I DO NOT enjoy however, how I am looked at by much of the outside world. Venturing out into public en femme is a tricky game for me. It doesn’t matter how I feel about myself or how well I understand it – people still look at me and laugh, make jokes, think that I’m “crazy” and “confused”, think that I’m “trying to fool people”, and some just flat out hate what I am – to the extent it becomes dangerous to get out without a solid plan ahead of time (and even then, there is still danger in the less than open-minded area I live). I always have to weigh all the negative factors against the potential rewards.
For what it’s worth, Laura – I understand how you feel. I understand the struggle. I experience the emotions first-hand, too. Regardless of education and personal knowledge, sometimes it just helps to hear that you’re not alone… and you’re not. :)
Difficult or not, you and I will both venture out into public again and again. We’ll both grow and learn as we do. There will be unpleasant experiences along with the good ones. In the end, that’s just a part of life for anyone, right? Best to focus on the positive and learn from the negative… and whenever possible, win over an open-mind or two along the way. :)
If stopping by and reading my offerings helps in any way, then PLEASE drop by often and recharge the t-batteries! If I have nothing else to show for my efforts in life when my time comes, it is very meaningful to know that I at least ignited a POSITIVE spark of energy in the lives of people who found their way here. :)
I am so happy for you and your one year. Your site is the one that has helped me the most. My husband just came out a week and a half ago. Not only do I understand, but also support him. I try to tell him everyday that he is safe and that I love both sides of him. I was feeling low about myself and even angry with me, not him. Then it turned around and found myself attracted to him dressed up, which lead to another problem for me. When I came across your site and read “How I Came Out to My Wife” and seen that your wife enjoyed it as did I, I no longer felt uneasy. I couldn’t find anything good about this and or being attracted to him/her til you talked about your wife.
Just wanted to say Thank you, I couldnt find any other place to put it. I think the world of what you have done for us, and hope that others find what we have found here.
Best Wishes for many more years strong and many more people/couples helped by you and your stories and experience.